Good time as any to laugh

It has been a while and I have been keeping mostly out of mischief.

Just thought I would post after hearing a old joke retold differently so that it just wasn't funny -or is that because I know the joke and the substitution didn't sit well with me.

The infamous sausage joke was substituted with two muffins in an oven (this blog about the muffin joke is rather amusing esp the comments and the rationale of the humour behind the joke -sad! but so is my post. I pinched the jokes below from the people's comments although I had heard most of them before). I just don't find muffin as funny as sausage but that may be because that's how I first heard it. In case you haven't heard it here is the version I knew:

Two sausages in a fry pan
One sausage turns to the other and says:
"Crap it's hot in here"
The other sausage replies:
"Ahhh a talking sausage"

Doing a few google searches I found many versions. One version starts with one sausage in the pan and a second is thrown in and says the first line. Quite a number of people seem to prefer the muffin to the sausage. On further searching I found another childhood joke with a different substitution (ah the fun memories of shouting CHICKEN at unsuspecting people... it doesn't work as well written down, oh well):

“How do you sell a deaf man a dog?”
“I don’t know”
You shout: “DO YOU WANT TO BUY A DOG?!”


Bottom line is though, as soon as you discuss and dissect the joke it looses it's humour, unless the analysis is over-the-top adding to the silliness.

While searching the internet here are a few more jokes that gave me a smile or caused a chuckle:


Two cows standing in a field.
A car drives past.
One cow says “mooooo!”
The second cow turns to the first and says,
“Bastard! I was going to say that!”


Two cows are sitting in a field. One cow says to the other “Have you heard about this Mad Cow’s disease that has been going around?” and the second cow replies “Really? How awful! Thank goodness I’m a helicopter”.


What do an elephant and an ant have in common?
I don’t know.
They both start with the letter “A”.
Hey, “elephant” does not start with “A”!
Ah, but my elephant’s name is Albert.


Q: How do you get an elephant out of a tree?
A: You throw a fridge at it!

Q: How do you stop a turtle from running away?
A: You put a fridge on its head.


What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wasa...bi?



How do you shoot a blue elephant?
With a blue elephant gun.

How do you shoot a pink elephant?
Hold its nose until turns blue, and then shoot it with the blue elephant gun



What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh


What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall?
Dam!


[Some of these just shouldn't make me laugh but once I have started...]

What do you call a guy who lets everyone walk all over him?
Mat.

What do you call the swimmer with no legs?
Bob.


[It made me smile to see the following old classic quoted by someone else]
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.

[And another of the same ilk which was new to me]
Q: what’s green and has four wheels ?
A: grass, I lied about the wheels


[I am the first to admit that I absolutely suck at telling jokes however I told the next set to a bunch o 'mericans and they cacked themselves. I was surprised it went down so well and couldn't believe they hadn't heard them before. They really aren't that funny but as G once told me perhaps the fact they had been drinking helped -thanks for the vote of confidence love!]

What do you call a deer with no eyes
No eye deer

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs
Still no eye deer


Oh oh I have to stop...
Okay so mood really can make or break a joke and I am in a silly mood.
To end, here's a funny pic from our drive Las Vegas to Zion: